So I’m Probably Not Even a Girl, Maybe

I had the utmost pleasure today to run into a friend that I haven’t seen in years.

begin scene:


SOMEBODY THAT I USED TO KNOW: Heyyyy I haven’t seen you in 53 billion years.

ME: No. It hasn’t been that long.

SOMEBODY THAT I USED TO KNOW: I was only exaggerating!! Hahahaha.

ME: Yea well stop it. It’s not mature and its only been 3.45 years

SOMEBODY THAT I USED TO KNOW: Hahahaha you’re soo funny.

ME: Yes I know.

[ Enter the how have you been? and the great and the same ol’ same ol’. How’s your mother and your sisters, and your 3rd cousin twice removed? Do you still live in that place? And Stacy is pregnant OMG?]

ME: It was great catching up with you. I miss your craziness.


SOMEBODY THAT I USED TO KNOW: Yea we should hang out . .

ME: Yea sure!

SOMEBODY THAT I USED TO KNOW: No seriously, this weekend! Let’s do something nice . .let’s get our nails done!

ME: I’m not a nails done person.

SOMEBODY THAT I USED TO KNOW: Okay, well we can just get some coffee and talk?

ME: I HATE coffee.

SOMEBODY THAT I USED TO KNOW: Oh wow. That’s wow . .what the hell do you drink then? tea?

ME: Yes and hot chocolate and sometimes when I’m up for something dangerous I take a sip of water.

SOMEBODY THAT I USED TO KNOW: Okay . . .hmmm . . . I got it!Let’s GO SHOPPING!!

ME: . . . .








SOMEBODY THAT I USED TO KNOW: Wow. . I just. . . wow. . .are you even a girl?

end scene

It’s true, I hate shopping. In fact if you want to punish me all you have to do is throw me in some shopping store.

Now obviously there are many types of shopping. Here is my list with my most favorite to the I really hate you type:

1) Book shopping- can be classified as fun, makes me happy

2) Food shopping- really makes me happy to know I can eat all that stuff later

3) Clothes shopping- not fun, more like a chore

4) Every thing else in the word- seriously, everything else


Oh My GOD. Shoe shopping. The worse thing ever. Why do people need so much styles of shoes? What’s wrong with them.

Now I love to dress up with cutsie pretty things (even shoes) but something about the whole shopping experience makes me want to cry. Its the rows and rows of clothing and shoes. I feel like they’re monster soldiers in formation getting ready to attack.

It makes me absolutely nauseous and it ruins the “fun” of shopping for everyone else. It’s hard for someone to enjoy themselves when someone else is whining “can we leave now” in their ear.

And so for this reason my femininity and feminhood has been threatened, how dare I be female and hate shopping ?

It’s not possible!

For that matter I must not even be human because who hates coffee??

I must be an alien zombie-face lion dinosaur, obviously. Also, I will probably name my kid that. Only if they are female though, it would be a dumb male name.

. . . .

 Okay everybody! It’s randomly change the subject time!

I finally “made” a twitter. I use the word made loosely because I honestly don’t know what I’ve done or how it works. But it’s done (I guess) so you all can like look at what I write there and whatever. There is a link of it on the side bar.

Warning: I tweet 19 kbillion times a minute,  I already made 2 billion tweets. So I might take up all the space in the internet.

Challenge status (what’s this about?): Day 8


8 thoughts on “So I’m Probably Not Even a Girl, Maybe

  1. Nails? Coffee?? Shopping??? Huh….all this time I thought I was a girl too. Nobody ever told me liking all that stuff was required. Oh well, at least I’m in good company when it comes to “probably not being a girl, maybe”

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